My first rodeo, never again so I hoped but alas not by far.
I am going to take a journey back in my life, January 25th 1985. I was 15 years old at that time, living in a group home. It was the tail end of exams. This particular day I did not have an exam to write and I had no particular reason to go into school other than to meet up with friends and go out partying.
AS previously stated I was living in a group home, I was not the good son, not even close. That was my older brother Steven who was 1 month shy of his 18th. Steve was the type of child any parent would want. Good in sports, musically talented, a good actor, well rounded student and everyone who met him liked him. Unlike myself who struggled in school, struggled at being the good son and my friends at the time lets just say they were not the popular or pretty ones with good grades. Most of the friends Steve made at high school were not even aware that he had a brother named Kevin even and we went to the same High School.
I remember that day as if it happened yesterday. I hung around school either in the Smoking area or cafeteria because exams were still going on I could not roam the halls until about 11:30 which is when the days first exams ended. I remember scooting to my locker to grab a few things and ran into my brother. He was alone so he actually stopped to talk to me for once we had a good chat, it was odd, we never had decent words to say to each other. He took off in a hurry as the lunch bell rang mumbling something about catching a ride and wanting to get the front seat for a change. I took off and met friends, then spent the afternoon at my buddies place bombing around on his snowmobile until we ran out of gas, then back to school so I could catch my bus to the group home.
I remember getting off the bus and as I walked in the lane way I noticed there were more cars there than should have been. More staff on hand than need be. My worker was there. It was his day off. “meh” i thought to myself, “probably a new kid coming in”
I was greeted at the door by Tom the facility manager and my worker Ron. They asked me where I was that afternoon as they were trying to get hold of me at school and could not because I did not have any exams that day. My first thought was “busted no week end privileges” but then the words came out “Your brother has been in an accident” they said “he is in the hospital” , “Go pack a bag we are taking you to your parents”
My world screeched to a halt.
The half hour drive to my folks house was a blur, although my impressions were that when I got home my parents would be taking me to the hospital so a could see my brother. Tom would not elaborate on what happened al he knew according to him was Steve was in an accident some time around noon and was in the hospital. it was now approaching 4:30.
We pull into the driveway and there are a few extra vehicles. Tom goes to the door first and I enter afterwards. I remember the odd looks on my parents faces. I remember saying something akin to “ok so are we going to the hospital?” and my dad angrily looking at tom replying “you didn’t tell him?” and Tom looking at me shaking his head saying “I thought it best that you tell him”
At that moment my mother burst into tears “Steve died”
I felt like I had been hit by a freight train… only to be hit many more times in the days to come. But that is for Another Post.